“At least you had the strength to see it,” Amirah said. “I had a few, unfortunate choices, shall we call them, back in Barnarock, that led to me leaving. I’m just glad my brother was able to support me.”
Chapter One
Barnarock
5 years ago
“He is totally staring at you, Mirah!”
Amirah smiled at her friend’s words, trying to concentrate on the clay in front of her.
“Saff, why would Blythe be staring at me?” she hissed back, trying not to draw attention to their conversation.
“The question you should be asking yourself is why wouldn’t he be staring at you? You’re the best ceramic artist the school has seen in years, not to mention, you’re gorgeous. Oh, look!” Saff started giggling. “He’s been so busy ogling you, his pot’s gone floopy! Bet it’s the only thing that is!”
Amirah shook her head, but risked a look across the room. Sure enough, Blythe’s pot had collapsed on the wheel although there was no indication he’d been looking her way, despite what Saff said.
“OK, class, stop what you’re doing,” the teacher called. Dale was primarily a glass expert, and the reason Amirah wanted to take this course. He was developing new techniques merging ceramics and glass and Amirah wanted to learn from him. His reputation as an artist was phenomenal, especially for someone as young as he was, and Amirah was keen to learn as much from him as possible.
“Now, we’re going to fire these overnight. However, we won’t glaze them. As your first project of the year, we’ll keep these as a baseline so we can track your progress. We’ll repeat this exercise in a few months, then again towards the end of the year.
“Mark them up with your signature and then clean up.”
Amirah took her needle tool from her wrap, and traced the delicate butterfly marking she’d used to sign her work since she was 15.
As Amirah and Saff left the classroom, they spotted Manny waiting outside, probably for Blythe. The two guys were as close as Amirah and Saff, and they’d shared classes together over the years at the art school. In fact, Amirah had been slightly surprised to see Blythe on his own when they entered the studio that morning, but thinking about the course structure, it made sense. Dale had set it up as a modular course - ceramics and glasswork could each be taken as stand alone classes. If you took at least one of them, you were able to join the theory class, but you could only do the combined glass and ceramics class next semester if you had done all of them this semester. Saff was only doing the pottery one, whilst Amirah was taking everything.
Blythe came out just behind them and walked over to Manny, doing their usual over the top handshake. Amirah giggled and shook her head.
“You joining us in the theory class, ladies?” Blythe called out.
“I’m not, but Mirah is,” Saff replied. “Enjoy yourselves!” She skipped off, leaving Amirah with the two guys.
They settled into the classroom two doors down and discussed their plans for the semester. Like Amirah, Blythe was doing the full course. He was hoping to incorporate some of the techniques into his sculptures, particularly his bas relief work. Manny was only doing the glass work and theory, but again it was with a view to developing his own techniques from it and how it would work with oil paints.
Dale walked and closed the door, looking at the three of them sitting together on one side of the room, and two students Amirah didn’t recognise on the other.
“Looks like you’ve already selected your work groups for the semester,” was his only comment.
Amirah and Saff packed up their lunch things, and Amirah got her books out to study, while Saff got ready to leave.
“Guess the boyfriends will be here soon,” she teased, “so I’ll make myself scarce!”
“Boyfriends?” Amirah asked in confusion, “I don’t have any boyfriends?”
“Oh please! I’ve seen how you look at Blythe and Manny, and how they look at you! So if you’re not making the most of them, it’s only because you’re all in denial! And speaking of, here they come. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do, boys!” she said with a grin as they passed each other.
“What was that about?” Blythe asked as they sat down.
Amirah shook her head. “Saff seems to think you’re both my boyfriends. Crazy, huh?”
The guys looked at each other. “What’s so crazy about that?” Manny asked.
“Seriously?” Amirah spluttered. “I can’t date two of you - that would be silly!”
No matter how much you might want to! her inner voice prodded.
“Can’t, not won’t?” teased Manny, “that’s an interesting distinction. Why would it be silly?”
“Because you can’t date two guys, Manny! Honestly! Why are we even having this conversation? Don’t you know how close the exams are? We need to study!”
Manny and Blythe looked at each other and grinned. Sure, they’d pin the conversation for now, but they would be revisiting this soon.
“Mirah, I really need some help with this pottery,” Blythe said. “Every time I think I’ve got it, something goes wrong.”
“All the pots I’ve seen you work on look fine to me. What sort of help were you looking for?” Amirah asked.
“Fine isn’t good enough, though, I want better than fine. And I’m not sure, but something a bit more practical than Dale yelling instructions at me. Maybe we could work on something together? Maybe getting a feel for how you handle the clay and the wheel would help?” Blythe knew the line was cheesy, but hoped she’d bite.
Amirah looked at him carefully, her head tilted to one side as she considered his suggestion.
“Okay,” she said finally. “After class today?”
“Works for me!” Blythe replied with a grin.
As soon as they started, Amirah realised she’d made a grave error in judgement. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to help Blythe, but he’d insisted the best way for him to get to grips - ha! - was to sit behind her at the wheel, and mimic her movements.
As a result, he was pressed against her back, arms and thighs, his chin resting on her shoulder. As well as the smell of the clay and resin they’d been using in class, there was a smokey scent that suggested he’d been working with glass earlier in the day, layered over a sharp citrusy smell that was just Blythe. All in all it was intoxicating and Amirah just wanted to lean back into him, forget about the pottery and see what happened.
That would be such a bad idea! she reminded herself. She shook her head to clear it and refocussed on the clay in front of her.
“How’d it go?” Manny asked when Blythe got home that night.
“Well, we got a decent pot out of it - somehow. Her hands were shaking, so I don’t think she’s as uninterested as she makes out. Walked her home to the flat she shares with Saff; it’s only a couple of blocks over, actually.
“She let me carry her bag and hold her hand. Given how independent Mirah is, I’ll take it as a win. She also let me kiss her on the cheek before she went inside.”
“That’s a start, at least. I’m going to ask her tomorrow about modelling for some of my portfolio pieces. If I pose her right, she can study as I paint.”
Blythe nodded. “She’s skittish, for sure. We just need to take it slowly.”
“Life modelling? Are you serious? Doesn’t that involve me stripping off?” Amirah asked, laughing.
“Only if you want it to,” Manny replied. “Honestly, your hair and eyes alone would be captivating, so I’d love to concentrate on them as a portrait. And you’ve got the perfect figure to allow fabric to drape just so, which also adds interest.”
Amirah listened to Manny list off all her attributes that made her the perfect model for his portfolio paintings. On the one hand, he was listing them as objective facts. On the other, hearing those words from him gave her a thrill. She’d had enough trouble getting the conversation about dating both of them out her head, and after Blythe’s pottery lesson, she was thinking of a lot more than just dating.
“When did you have in mind?” she asked finally. “I know this is going to take longer than the pottery lesson I gave Blythe last week.”
“How about Saturday?” Manny suggested. “I can spend the day making rough sketches that I can work from over the next couple of weeks, then we can do another session for finishing touches?”
Amirah nodded. “I can work my study planner round that, no problem.”
“Bring your books. A lot of the poses I have in mind, you can still study while I work.”
It was Sunday morning before Blythe caught up with Manny.
“You were late last night. It went well, I take it?”
“Very, have a look,” Manny replied, passing over his sketchbook. Well, his main sketchbook. His spare one was still in his bag, and he wasn’t ready to share those sketches with anyone yet. He’d eventually convinced Amirah to strip for one last pose, and the images were branded into his mind, never mind his sketchbook.
“You got her clothes off, you lucky bastard?” Blythe asked. Manny blinked - had he handed over the wrong book? Then he looked at the sketch Blythe was pointing to.
“Not quite, got her to slip her sleeves off and bare her shoulders, and tuck her skirt up. The rest is hidden behind the back of the chair in front of her.”
“Clever,” Blythe replied. “Anything happen, you were so late home?” He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.
“Sadly, no. We just lost track of time. Wasn’t until security did a final sweep of the building we realised how late it was. Walked her home like a gentleman, of course, and here we are.”
Over the next couple of months, both men spent as much time as possible courting Amirah, that was the only word for it. Amirah, for her part, was aware of what they were doing and was trying so hard to resist, going no further than hand-holding and the occasional kiss.
She finally cracked when the subject of the graduation ball came up, and they both turned up with hand blown glass roses to convince her to let them both accompany her. The roses were now displayed on her dressing table in a delicate bud vase she’d made to hold them.
The night arrived, and Saff insisted on helping Amirah get ready.
“You are going to sleep with them tonight, aren’t you, Mirah?” Saff pleaded. “I can’t believe you’ve held out this long! Not just with them, I can’t believe you’ve got to our age and haven’t slept with anyone!”
“I don’t know, maybe, probably? I mean, how would it even work with two of them? The logistics are terrifying!” Amirah shook her head. “I do think the tension has worked to enable us to produce better work for our portfolios though.”
“Seriously, Mirah? You’re the only person I know that would use sexual frustration to better your art!”
Saff walked round her friend, checking her handiwork. Amirah’s hair was half pinned up, with the rest cascading in ringlets down her back. Minimal make up only enhanced her purple eyes. Her long black sheath dress was strapless and had a slit up one thigh to make it easier to walk. The one thing Amirah insisted on was that she wore her boots instead of heels. Those, plus the choker she wore, gave the outfit a slightly tougher look that worked.
At that, there was a knock at the door, and the two of them giggled, before going to answer it.
Both men wore tuxedos with cummerbunds and ties to match the roses they’d given Amirah already. They also had matching flowers for her to wear, finishing off the outfit.
Amirah took the arms they offered, and the three of them headed towards the art school and its ballroom.
Dale came over to their table to congratulate them. “My three top students! You’re all going to go far, you know. And if you continue to work together, the sky’s the limit!”
“Thank you, sir,” Amirah said with a smile. “I’ve learned a lot from you this year.”
“It’s been a pleasure teaching you, all of you,” Dale replied.
“Here’s to the future!” Blythe said, holding his glass up as a toast.
By eleven o’clock they were all eaten and danced out. Amirah wasn’t even drunk, so she knew that what she had planned was all her and not alcohol.
“Can we go upstairs and look at our portfolios again?” she asked. “I don’t think I saw all your paintings, Manny.”
What she was really thinking about was privacy, the couch she’d posed for Manny on, and the convenience of the wet room attached, so they wouldn’t need to sneak to the toilets after to clean up.
Their final pieces were on full display - Amirah’s vase used alternating strips of coloured glass with the clay to allow the light to play through it. Blythe’s abstract statue showcased the glass glazing techniques he and Dale had perfected, and Manny’s painting used glass through the paints to enhance the colours. In the end, he’s gone for the not-nude of Amirah on the chair, and agreed to use the sketch where her head was forward, her hair obscuring her face.
The rest of the works were in the storage area at the end of the room, and as the guys headed there, Amirah excused herself to the toilet.
“OK girl,” she hissed at her reflection, “you can do this.” She freshened up and, on impulse, removed her pants and put the scrap of lace into her bag. ‘Give them a surprise,’ she thought.
As she approached the storage area, she heard them talking.
“I thought you said you didn’t score?”
“I didn’t!”
“You got her clothes off though, didn’t tell me that!”
“Yeah, didn't get to touch, though. You were pressed so close against her for your pottery lesson that you were practically fucking her no doubt, so I think we’re even. When did you plan to tell her you’ve been using a wheel since you were ten?”
“Never? What she doesn’t know won’t hurt her.”
Amirah froze as she listened to their back and forth. It was somewhere between banter and an argument, but it was clear from what she could hear that, while she’d been falling in love, everything they’d done that year was to see who could be first to bed her.
Quietly, with silent tears streaming down her face, she slipped out the room.
As she reached the end of the corridor, Dale appeared. Taking one look at Amirah’s face, he pulled her into the nearest classroom.
“What happened?” he asked.
Amirah just blurted it all out, and watched as her professor's face grew angrier.
“Can you please keep them here to give me time to get home?” she asked.
Dale nodded. “If there’s anything you need, let me know.”
“I will, sir, thank you. For everything. My brother is heading on an adventure, I may join him.” That was safe to tell him. Although both Manny and Blythe had met Arvio, she’d never mentioned his plans to either guy. All that would confirm was she’d left town.
“Be safe, and may Peach guide you,” Dale replied. Amirah took off out the building, while he headed back to the classroom.
Blythe and Manny were standing in the middle of the room looking confused when he walked in.
“Evening sir, have you seen Mirah?” Blythe asked. “She was here a moment ago.”
“Boys, sit down. We need to talk.”
They both started jabbering at him at once. Dale took a deep breath and pinched the bridge of his nose. There was only one thing for it.
"Sit. Down. Now." He didn't like bringing out what he called his teacher's voice, but needs must.
They immediately dropped onto the sofa and stared at him.
"I've just had an interesting conversation with Amirah. What in the Darkness were you thinking? I've spent the whole year watching the three of you fall in love - unconventional, true, but people expect it from artists. Watching you connect and build each other up, seeing the effect on all your work has been fascinating. But now, one very brokenhearted young lady has just run out of here convinced that you were just using her, lying to her to try and get laid?"
He paused for a moment, and watched the colour drain from their faces as they realised exactly what she'd heard.
"You lied to her to get pottery lessons, Blythe? Seriously? She heard you say that what she doesn't know won't hurt her. Do you think she'll ever trust either of you again?"
“If she’d come back two minutes later…” Blythe started to say.
“You don’t get it!” Dale interrupted. “It’s not about whether she heard you or not! The very fact you were capable of acting like that in the first place is what is so despicable.”
Many dropped his head into his hands. “I need to go after her! This isn’t how tonight was supposed to end.”
“No? How was it supposed to end? You screw her then ghost her? Because right now, that’s how you’re acting!”
Manny and Blythe looked at each other, then reached into their jacket pockets.
“Quite the opposite, we were going to offer her these,” Manny said, as they held out matching heart knots.
“Well you fucked that chance up, didn’t you? And no, you’re not going after her. She specifically asked me to make sure you didn’t.”
“So what do we do now?” Blythe asked.
Dale’s anger deflated as he saw how dejected they both looked. Despite the fact they were all adults, he forgot sometimes how young they were. The ten years between him and them had never seemed so large.
“You let her calm down. Then you find a bloody good way to apologise. She might accept it, she might not. Either way, you need to live with the consequences of your actions.”
Saff, I’m sorry to run off without saying goodbye, please just know that I have to go. Don’t worry, neither of the guys did anything I didn’t want them to but the whole of the last six months has been a lie.
I’ve taken the essentials, but if you can pack up the rest of my things and send them to ma and pa, they’ll forward them on to Arvio and I once we’re settled.
Love you,
Mirah.
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